Things Kids Say: Age 5

I've been trying to write down the funny things that Alexis, Jack, and Faith say, so here are some of the best comments from our soon to be 6-year-olds:

Alexis...

Graham has a natural snotty face. 

I’ll hold your ears. [When Faith was using a hand dryer in a Starbucks bathroom and she was afraid of the noise.]

I think when Daddy is done with his work job he should be a policeman because he just loves donuts.

Mom, when are we going to get the lamb rock? [She was looking at the large hole in our ceiling that we had from a leak...she meant sheet rock, but apparently she thought we had been saying SHEEP rock). 

I would be a little shy working with a lion. [She was reading a book about a vet who had to fix a lion's leg, and she wants to be a vet when she grows up so she was imagining herself doing this job. I think "shy" is an understatement since I would be terrified.]

Faith...

Albert Einstein? Samual told me he died!

This music is radical. [When listening to a cd Micah made for me 20 years ago.]

This hammer was made in China! [The kids had just finished a unit on China in school, and she had no idea that everything cheap is made in China.]

Mama, some day we should really have you in the newspaper for cooking!

I’m as cold as a homeless person. [Unfortunately we see too many homeless people on the streets of ABQ, and I guess she thought about how cold that would be.]

I love Grammy Karen the best because she invented back scratching!

I’m as fast as the average human! [Followed by...what does average mean?]

I don’t want to be anything when I grow up. Just a mom...with no kids.

[When driving past a really stinky cow farm...] ”Graham is poopy for sure. I can smell it.”

Jack...

Wow, that is more beautiful than I dreamed! [When looking at a mermaid costume for Faith that had been put away for awhile.]

I hope I get married. I want someone to talk to. 

Bagels with butter are just so buttery.

Mom, when there is a girl singing [on the radio] and you sing along, it sounds like one person. 

I wish they would just give us gift cards so we can buy what we want. [This was said on the way home from church after he picked a prize out of a box for drawing a picture.]

Shoes in Spanish are called sneakers.

Jack: How many calories are in wine?
Me: I don’t know.
Jack: Ask Siri.
Micah: Did he just tell you to ask Siri?
Jack: She knows everything! 

[When playing 'I Spy' in the car on the way to school...] 
Alexis: I spy something gray. 
Faith: Mom's hair.